Like I am you and you are me...
- Clem Snide, "Moment in the Sun"
"The Stars Align"
I'm having a hard time coming to grips with the idea that things can actually just work out. Even if it is just for a few hours.
I guess I was some how under the impression that I'd spend the rest of my life saying the wrong thing, wishing things could be different, or just generally uncomfortable and bumfuzzled.
I never thought I'd ever go on a good date.
But apparently, everything doesn't have to go wrong. And while that's probably not the biggest revelation in the world to you, I think it's a big step for me.
"Changes"
If you'd told me freshman year in high school that I'd be living with Brent Jones my senior year of college, I would have said, "What?! What the hell are you talking about?! Why would you say such a thing?!? Take it back! Take it back!!!"
Funny what seven years can do.
"A Job Well Done"
My days of sitting around at the desk drawing stick figures and getting paid are almost behind me. It's the closest to a paid writing gig I've ever come, and it's just about over.
I think I'm going to spend my summer working at the movie theater back in KC. (Actually, I guess I should say a movie theater, not the movie theater, seeing as there is more than one, but it's the one me and the O'Hara Lads always went to see romantic comedies, so it kind of is the movie theater. ["Hey, I don't want to get into a semantics argument with you, I just want the protein."])
I really only see three problems with this arrangement:
1) Must trick them into hiring me.
2) No car.
3) Navy blue slacks.
Luckily for me, this is where being in debt finally works out for me. I owe both Brent and my sister about $300 each (oddly enough, I borrowed this money from them to pay the same $450 bill... How does the math work on something like this?). Brent's got the connections at the movie theater to get me the job, which he'll do because, after all, he wants his money. And my sister will let me borrow her car to go to work because, after all, she wants her money. Better living through capitalism.
There is, however, no salvation from navy blue slacks. Which is a crying baby shame, because the day I walked out of Archbishop Edwin Vincent O'Hara High School, I swore on a stack of Christian Brothers that I would be damned if I ever slipped dark blue tweed over my tighty whiteys (which doesn't really answer that question, if you know what I mean. [What do you mean, what do I mean? I mean, I wear a mix of fashion briefs and boxers dependent upon whether or not I can risk going a little less than unfettered or not, or which way the laundry stink is drifting. {I have no idea what I'm talking about either, and the parentheses within parentheses thing is starting to confuse me, too}]).
Uh, so yeah. I guess I'll deal... or something.
"Crazy Time"
As you may be able to tell, I'm having a bit of a moment today. Seriously. I think I'm on drugs. Send help.
"Closure"
You know it's funny (not really funny haha, as I think I'm really starting to over use the word "funny" in this sense), but there are a few occasions in which you do something for the last time and don't really realize it. There's this whole thing in Salman Rushdie's The Ground Beneath Her Feet in which the main character leaves India for the last time, not really realizing he's never going to go back (sorry if I've ruined anything for those of you who haven't read this but were planning to, but hey, you've had, like four years to read it, I'm not sure if I care... and you know what? At the end of Sixth Sense, it turns out Bruce Willis was dead the whole time. And if you haven't read Watchmen yet, it turns out Ozymandias is the killer, and he's got this whole mad scheme planned out [Reign it in, Clarky]).
I guess my point is that the strangest things are those that end without you really noticing. There has been a dozen times in which I told myself that I was doing something for the last time, and I was either wrong, or it ended up not really mattering.
Some things just stop. Abruptly and almost inexplicably.
I'd like to believe I'd appreciate these things if I knew.
"Replacements"
Remember that "Banditos" song with that line about Captain Jean-Luc Picard?
Wait a minute... that was the Refreshments. The Replacements did that "Can't Hardly Wait" song.
Never mind then... but more on Picard later.
"The New World"
Fairweather friends... piffle.
Someone you can sit outside with to watch a storm... priceless.
"Goodbye, Sadie"
Like so many young black men, the song “Gin and Juice” always reminds me of my father.
"Charity Cases"
I had three bucks burning in my pocket today, and I couldn’t even give it away. I wanted to buy some food, but people kept giving me free pizza. It was annoying. Then, when I tried to give a dollar to a guy at the vending machine, he gave it back because the damn thing wouldn’t take his money.
Luckily for me, I just remembered that I forgot to return Harold and Maude yesterday. Late fees ought to take care of it.
"Small Town Guys"
Can’t wait to get back to that Mecca of Midwestern civilization... the Raytown Wal-Mart.
"Two Days of Freedom"
More like two days to freedom. Am I right?
"Ends and Means"
Remember at the end of the first movie when Captain Picard told Gandalf that he feels a “great swell of pity for the poor soul who comes to that school looking for trouble”.
You really understand why after Leopold goes berserk on all those guys, like, half an hour into the second flick.
"Youth Bandits"
You ever see that movie Time Bandits?
Me neither, but they mention it in Deadpool #9, I think. The one with Death Trap.
"Things To Do Today"
I have to write my last paper in FARC tomorrow. I’d almost be sad if, you know, it wasn’t for that soc class.
"Nice Guys Finish Last"
Sorry Smith.
"Wheel of Justice"
Remember that Wheel of Morality at the end of Animaniacs episodes. That was pretty cool.
"Lloyd"
I have an Uncle Lloyd, but if I understand things correctly, he goes by Urlin because that was my grandfather’s name, though Lloyd was his (my grandfather’s) middle name... maybe. I know Lenar (my first name for the uninformed) is my dad’s middle name. Maybe it’s a weird family tradition. But by that rationale, my first born son will be named Francois instead of Kal-El, and I don’t want to punish him that way. I want to punish him my way.
"Trust"
I’m serious.
"The Shot"
I want to play basketball.
"Power of the Person"
My Priest taught me the wisdom of allowing someone to follow their own path. And my Bendis said “I can’t be responsible for you.”
"Memory Lane"
Speaking of prom night, I just remembered this amusing little anecdote about Smith’s deluded scheme to get 10 girls and 10 guys to all go to prom in a group. I simply couldn’t stand for that, ‘cause prommunism’s for sissies.
Actually, that anecdote isn’t as amusing as I remember it being.
"Last Chance"
Again, someone remind me about the waffle thing.
Seriously. This took me two days. Don’t let me do it again.
- Clem Snide, "Moment in the Sun"
"The Stars Align"
I'm having a hard time coming to grips with the idea that things can actually just work out. Even if it is just for a few hours.
I guess I was some how under the impression that I'd spend the rest of my life saying the wrong thing, wishing things could be different, or just generally uncomfortable and bumfuzzled.
I never thought I'd ever go on a good date.
But apparently, everything doesn't have to go wrong. And while that's probably not the biggest revelation in the world to you, I think it's a big step for me.
"Changes"
If you'd told me freshman year in high school that I'd be living with Brent Jones my senior year of college, I would have said, "What?! What the hell are you talking about?! Why would you say such a thing?!? Take it back! Take it back!!!"
Funny what seven years can do.
"A Job Well Done"
My days of sitting around at the desk drawing stick figures and getting paid are almost behind me. It's the closest to a paid writing gig I've ever come, and it's just about over.
I think I'm going to spend my summer working at the movie theater back in KC. (Actually, I guess I should say a movie theater, not the movie theater, seeing as there is more than one, but it's the one me and the O'Hara Lads always went to see romantic comedies, so it kind of is the movie theater. ["Hey, I don't want to get into a semantics argument with you, I just want the protein."])
I really only see three problems with this arrangement:
1) Must trick them into hiring me.
2) No car.
3) Navy blue slacks.
Luckily for me, this is where being in debt finally works out for me. I owe both Brent and my sister about $300 each (oddly enough, I borrowed this money from them to pay the same $450 bill... How does the math work on something like this?). Brent's got the connections at the movie theater to get me the job, which he'll do because, after all, he wants his money. And my sister will let me borrow her car to go to work because, after all, she wants her money. Better living through capitalism.
There is, however, no salvation from navy blue slacks. Which is a crying baby shame, because the day I walked out of Archbishop Edwin Vincent O'Hara High School, I swore on a stack of Christian Brothers that I would be damned if I ever slipped dark blue tweed over my tighty whiteys (which doesn't really answer that question, if you know what I mean. [What do you mean, what do I mean? I mean, I wear a mix of fashion briefs and boxers dependent upon whether or not I can risk going a little less than unfettered or not, or which way the laundry stink is drifting. {I have no idea what I'm talking about either, and the parentheses within parentheses thing is starting to confuse me, too}]).
Uh, so yeah. I guess I'll deal... or something.
"Crazy Time"
As you may be able to tell, I'm having a bit of a moment today. Seriously. I think I'm on drugs. Send help.
"Closure"
You know it's funny (not really funny haha, as I think I'm really starting to over use the word "funny" in this sense), but there are a few occasions in which you do something for the last time and don't really realize it. There's this whole thing in Salman Rushdie's The Ground Beneath Her Feet in which the main character leaves India for the last time, not really realizing he's never going to go back (sorry if I've ruined anything for those of you who haven't read this but were planning to, but hey, you've had, like four years to read it, I'm not sure if I care... and you know what? At the end of Sixth Sense, it turns out Bruce Willis was dead the whole time. And if you haven't read Watchmen yet, it turns out Ozymandias is the killer, and he's got this whole mad scheme planned out [Reign it in, Clarky]).
I guess my point is that the strangest things are those that end without you really noticing. There has been a dozen times in which I told myself that I was doing something for the last time, and I was either wrong, or it ended up not really mattering.
Some things just stop. Abruptly and almost inexplicably.
I'd like to believe I'd appreciate these things if I knew.
"Replacements"
Remember that "Banditos" song with that line about Captain Jean-Luc Picard?
Wait a minute... that was the Refreshments. The Replacements did that "Can't Hardly Wait" song.
Never mind then... but more on Picard later.
"The New World"
Fairweather friends... piffle.
Someone you can sit outside with to watch a storm... priceless.
"Goodbye, Sadie"
Like so many young black men, the song “Gin and Juice” always reminds me of my father.
"Charity Cases"
I had three bucks burning in my pocket today, and I couldn’t even give it away. I wanted to buy some food, but people kept giving me free pizza. It was annoying. Then, when I tried to give a dollar to a guy at the vending machine, he gave it back because the damn thing wouldn’t take his money.
Luckily for me, I just remembered that I forgot to return Harold and Maude yesterday. Late fees ought to take care of it.
"Small Town Guys"
Can’t wait to get back to that Mecca of Midwestern civilization... the Raytown Wal-Mart.
"Two Days of Freedom"
More like two days to freedom. Am I right?
"Ends and Means"
Remember at the end of the first movie when Captain Picard told Gandalf that he feels a “great swell of pity for the poor soul who comes to that school looking for trouble”.
You really understand why after Leopold goes berserk on all those guys, like, half an hour into the second flick.
"Youth Bandits"
You ever see that movie Time Bandits?
Me neither, but they mention it in Deadpool #9, I think. The one with Death Trap.
"Things To Do Today"
I have to write my last paper in FARC tomorrow. I’d almost be sad if, you know, it wasn’t for that soc class.
"Nice Guys Finish Last"
Sorry Smith.
"Wheel of Justice"
Remember that Wheel of Morality at the end of Animaniacs episodes. That was pretty cool.
"Lloyd"
I have an Uncle Lloyd, but if I understand things correctly, he goes by Urlin because that was my grandfather’s name, though Lloyd was his (my grandfather’s) middle name... maybe. I know Lenar (my first name for the uninformed) is my dad’s middle name. Maybe it’s a weird family tradition. But by that rationale, my first born son will be named Francois instead of Kal-El, and I don’t want to punish him that way. I want to punish him my way.
"Trust"
I’m serious.
"The Shot"
I want to play basketball.
"Power of the Person"
My Priest taught me the wisdom of allowing someone to follow their own path. And my Bendis said “I can’t be responsible for you.”
"Memory Lane"
Speaking of prom night, I just remembered this amusing little anecdote about Smith’s deluded scheme to get 10 girls and 10 guys to all go to prom in a group. I simply couldn’t stand for that, ‘cause prommunism’s for sissies.
Actually, that anecdote isn’t as amusing as I remember it being.
"Last Chance"
Again, someone remind me about the waffle thing.
Seriously. This took me two days. Don’t let me do it again.
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