Can we hear that Radiohead track just once more?
-Alan Moore, "Misty Magic Land"
"Red Wine and Slepping Pills"
I was taking a furious whiz at Target the other day, when I felt this odd compulsion to utter the words "So, what are you saying there, little man? You don't like Zep?"
Two seconds after saying it, the toilet next to me flushed, and one of my coworkers came out of the stall. We didn't make eye contact or anything, because guys don't do that in a mensroom, but I'm pretty sure if we did, he would have shot me a look that said, I'm sorry, but did you just ask you penis whether or not it likes Led Zeppelin? Only it probably would have said it in Spanish so I would have been confused. That happens a lot there.
Now, of course, I wasn't questioning my member on it's musical taste. I mean, my favorite song might be "Evaporated," but everybody knows that the Black Panther loves "Tangerine". (Actually, nobody knows the Black Panther. 'specially not biblically. God... I'm totally straying from my point...)
My point, and I swear, I have one, is that sometimes a line in movie or a TV show gets stuck in my head, and I find myself just saying it at odd times. Usually when I'm in traffic, but most often when I'm (presumably) alone in the bathroom. The Zep thing's one from The Venture Bros. and a pretty good example of what I'm talking about. These lines I pick are rarely anybody's favorite line. They're usually not even very funny or profound. They're just things I like for the same reason I lick 9 volt batteries: I have no idea.
Take Shrek 2 for another example. I love that bit where Shrek, Donkey, and Puss-in-Boots are drinking in that bar after The Godmother's explained her stupid plan or whatever, and Puss mutters "I hate Mondays," apropos of nothing. Or that moment in I Heart Huckabees after Max and Marky Mark have invited themselves over to that Christian family's house for dinner where they start that big fight and they get kicked out of the house and Fischer turns to Mark and goes, "Whoa. Crazy in there."
So anyhoozle, I just saw Sideways and now I find myself saying "I like other wines beside Pinot."
But seriously, how great a scene is that? There Harvey Pekar and Silver Sable sit out on the porch while their friends two rooms away. And yet despite the awkwardness of the situation, they manage to have this profound moment of intimacy that he goes and ruins by running off to the bathroom. And he realizes his mistake and tries to get the moment back, but he can't because it's just gone -- which, of course goes back to Sable's whole thing about how a bottle of wine is this living thing that continues to change and evolve until it peaks and then begins its inevitable decline.
There are just some people who can't lean in and kiss a girl when we're supposed to. Our posture's too good.
"Once Again, I'm in Trouble with My Only Friend"
Yeesh.
"Such a Pretty House and Such a Pretty Garden"
I have a Brodie Bruce inaction figure waiting for a cubicle of its ver own.
I have a fantastic art piece entitled "The Escapist" waiting for a wall to hang upon.
And Brent has The Throne of the Wakandas in his living room. I bet he spilled soda on it.
"Get Up Go Over and Turn This Tape Off"
Ug. Can't stretch this Radiohead premise any further. Sorry. I tried.
NEXT:
"Songblog II"
-Alan Moore, "Misty Magic Land"
"Red Wine and Slepping Pills"
I was taking a furious whiz at Target the other day, when I felt this odd compulsion to utter the words "So, what are you saying there, little man? You don't like Zep?"
Two seconds after saying it, the toilet next to me flushed, and one of my coworkers came out of the stall. We didn't make eye contact or anything, because guys don't do that in a mensroom, but I'm pretty sure if we did, he would have shot me a look that said, I'm sorry, but did you just ask you penis whether or not it likes Led Zeppelin? Only it probably would have said it in Spanish so I would have been confused. That happens a lot there.
Now, of course, I wasn't questioning my member on it's musical taste. I mean, my favorite song might be "Evaporated," but everybody knows that the Black Panther loves "Tangerine". (Actually, nobody knows the Black Panther. 'specially not biblically. God... I'm totally straying from my point...)
My point, and I swear, I have one, is that sometimes a line in movie or a TV show gets stuck in my head, and I find myself just saying it at odd times. Usually when I'm in traffic, but most often when I'm (presumably) alone in the bathroom. The Zep thing's one from The Venture Bros. and a pretty good example of what I'm talking about. These lines I pick are rarely anybody's favorite line. They're usually not even very funny or profound. They're just things I like for the same reason I lick 9 volt batteries: I have no idea.
Take Shrek 2 for another example. I love that bit where Shrek, Donkey, and Puss-in-Boots are drinking in that bar after The Godmother's explained her stupid plan or whatever, and Puss mutters "I hate Mondays," apropos of nothing. Or that moment in I Heart Huckabees after Max and Marky Mark have invited themselves over to that Christian family's house for dinner where they start that big fight and they get kicked out of the house and Fischer turns to Mark and goes, "Whoa. Crazy in there."
So anyhoozle, I just saw Sideways and now I find myself saying "I like other wines beside Pinot."
But seriously, how great a scene is that? There Harvey Pekar and Silver Sable sit out on the porch while their friends two rooms away. And yet despite the awkwardness of the situation, they manage to have this profound moment of intimacy that he goes and ruins by running off to the bathroom. And he realizes his mistake and tries to get the moment back, but he can't because it's just gone -- which, of course goes back to Sable's whole thing about how a bottle of wine is this living thing that continues to change and evolve until it peaks and then begins its inevitable decline.
There are just some people who can't lean in and kiss a girl when we're supposed to. Our posture's too good.
"Once Again, I'm in Trouble with My Only Friend"
Yeesh.
"Such a Pretty House and Such a Pretty Garden"
I have a Brodie Bruce inaction figure waiting for a cubicle of its ver own.
I have a fantastic art piece entitled "The Escapist" waiting for a wall to hang upon.
And Brent has The Throne of the Wakandas in his living room. I bet he spilled soda on it.
"Get Up Go Over and Turn This Tape Off"
Ug. Can't stretch this Radiohead premise any further. Sorry. I tried.
NEXT:
"Songblog II"
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