Yay now is fighty time fighty time, blood blood blood.
-Joe Kelly, "It's A Barbarian Bunny Busty Broad Bonanza In My Brainpan... And I'm The Only One Invited!"
The Story Before, Part 2:
The First Seven Pages
I could not find that disc Neufeld burned of my first Clarky story.
I don't know if I left it in Kansas City, or if it's in one of a million shoeboxes scattered around the spider-hole, but I made the mess a little messier searching and came up with nothing.
I did, however, find the first Clarky story itself, and -- despite working through the whole weekend -- found time to hit the Kinkos for another late-night scanning session.
I have written before about the completion of my first stick figure story, and I don't really want to again. But for some reason there's no way to hyperlink to that particular entry, so here's the 30-word or less version:
When I was 16, I was supposed to read 300 pages of The Grapes of Wrath. Instead I wrote and illustrated an eight page children's book for immature adolescents.
I debated whether or not posting this really achieves any of the goals I've set for "The Story Before" series, which is all about rebuilding my practical blogging skills [which is code for "reposting old crap as if it's new crap and making it look like I'm really back in the swing of things, while dusting off ancient memories and getting all nostalgic, even though I claim to be all about the future now"] and avoiding huge time-and-bandwidth-consuming (though ultimately pointless) stick-figure entries, but in the end, I figured what the hell.
After all, this is my chance to impress upon you how much my art has evolved. Compare the work that follows with the worst pages of The Long Stick Figure Nightmare (I really should come up with an official title for that crap... any suggestions?), and I think you'll be amazed by the progress I've made over the last eight years. (Wait a minute... Eight years?! I've been doing this crap for almost a decade?! I have clearly wasted my life...)
Besides, it's only 7 pages. And that's something to admire right there, isn't it?
There was once a time when I could get in, hit whatever story marks I wanted to make, and get the hell out.
If I did this same story today, I'd totally Bendis-it-up. "Ultimate Clarky Clarkington III vs. the Bunny-Bun-Bunnies: Clarky Clegins" would be told in seven sixty-page acts, feature a whole slag of superfluous superhero cameos, and hinge upon a shitload of head-scratching time travel crap which doesn't even really serve the story I'm trying to tell.
Not that what follows really qualifies as a story. Just the usual slew of inside jokes that three people might get, if they still cared to speak to me.
O, t'was a golden age...
Some of you in the know may have been surprised to see that my first Clarky story was actually done with a standard bic ballpoint pen. Now, before you cry sacrilege at the Altar of Uniball, beseeching the Seven Terrible Gods of the Rollerball to visit hellacious torments upon my personage, let me assure you that both the flames and the blood were rendered with a good ol' uniball vision elite. I thought that really made it pop, which is why I was sure to upgrade when I started work on "Clarky Clarkington III Goes to Hell" a few weeks later. Of course when I did the original trilogy, I was just using black, red, blue, and purple. It wasn't until I started on the prequels that I expanded the palet to include the other four colors. But I digress...
And if you're curious as to why there are creases on every page, it's because, upon reading this in French class, the Great Walburn wrote the above review (my first ever back-cover blurb -- which remains to this day my absolute favorite thing anybody's ever said about my writing... for all time!), folded it into a paper airplane, and threw it at me.
A golden age indeed.
In our next installment, we set the wayback machine for the big senior year homecoming dance, wedge ourselves into my first perilous ascent over the fourth wall, and explore the beginning of that same "there's no such thing as too much information" attitude that's made my blog a interweb destination for, like, a dozen lucky people.
NEXT:
"Never Mind"
-Joe Kelly, "It's A Barbarian Bunny Busty Broad Bonanza In My Brainpan... And I'm The Only One Invited!"
The Story Before, Part 2:
The First Seven Pages
I could not find that disc Neufeld burned of my first Clarky story.
I don't know if I left it in Kansas City, or if it's in one of a million shoeboxes scattered around the spider-hole, but I made the mess a little messier searching and came up with nothing.
I did, however, find the first Clarky story itself, and -- despite working through the whole weekend -- found time to hit the Kinkos for another late-night scanning session.
I have written before about the completion of my first stick figure story, and I don't really want to again. But for some reason there's no way to hyperlink to that particular entry, so here's the 30-word or less version:
When I was 16, I was supposed to read 300 pages of The Grapes of Wrath. Instead I wrote and illustrated an eight page children's book for immature adolescents.
I debated whether or not posting this really achieves any of the goals I've set for "The Story Before" series, which is all about rebuilding my practical blogging skills [which is code for "reposting old crap as if it's new crap and making it look like I'm really back in the swing of things, while dusting off ancient memories and getting all nostalgic, even though I claim to be all about the future now"] and avoiding huge time-and-bandwidth-consuming (though ultimately pointless) stick-figure entries, but in the end, I figured what the hell.
After all, this is my chance to impress upon you how much my art has evolved. Compare the work that follows with the worst pages of The Long Stick Figure Nightmare (I really should come up with an official title for that crap... any suggestions?), and I think you'll be amazed by the progress I've made over the last eight years. (Wait a minute... Eight years?! I've been doing this crap for almost a decade?! I have clearly wasted my life...)
Besides, it's only 7 pages. And that's something to admire right there, isn't it?
There was once a time when I could get in, hit whatever story marks I wanted to make, and get the hell out.
If I did this same story today, I'd totally Bendis-it-up. "Ultimate Clarky Clarkington III vs. the Bunny-Bun-Bunnies: Clarky Clegins" would be told in seven sixty-page acts, feature a whole slag of superfluous superhero cameos, and hinge upon a shitload of head-scratching time travel crap which doesn't even really serve the story I'm trying to tell.
Not that what follows really qualifies as a story. Just the usual slew of inside jokes that three people might get, if they still cared to speak to me.
O, t'was a golden age...
Some of you in the know may have been surprised to see that my first Clarky story was actually done with a standard bic ballpoint pen. Now, before you cry sacrilege at the Altar of Uniball, beseeching the Seven Terrible Gods of the Rollerball to visit hellacious torments upon my personage, let me assure you that both the flames and the blood were rendered with a good ol' uniball vision elite. I thought that really made it pop, which is why I was sure to upgrade when I started work on "Clarky Clarkington III Goes to Hell" a few weeks later. Of course when I did the original trilogy, I was just using black, red, blue, and purple. It wasn't until I started on the prequels that I expanded the palet to include the other four colors. But I digress...
And if you're curious as to why there are creases on every page, it's because, upon reading this in French class, the Great Walburn wrote the above review (my first ever back-cover blurb -- which remains to this day my absolute favorite thing anybody's ever said about my writing... for all time!), folded it into a paper airplane, and threw it at me.
A golden age indeed.
In our next installment, we set the wayback machine for the big senior year homecoming dance, wedge ourselves into my first perilous ascent over the fourth wall, and explore the beginning of that same "there's no such thing as too much information" attitude that's made my blog a interweb destination for, like, a dozen lucky people.
NEXT:
"Never Mind"
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