My focus was a little narrow. Got lost in the forest starin' at all those trees. Killing that one man meant the whole world to me. Which is to say, my world was just that small. A world with only two people in it: Me and the man tryin' to steal everything I was. I needed a wake-up call.
It was neither selfless nor heroic. Neither compassionate not gallant. It was just me, living on my two-man world six seconds too long.

- Christopher Priest, "Chapter X"

"Confessions of a Dangerous Mime"
I was marked for death this morning... but I'm not really allowed to talk about it.

"I'm a Cancer but I Got Better"
I spent about two weeks almost convinced that I had breast cancer.

Really. I wouldn't joke about this type of thing. It's just not funny.

I actually went all the way down to the student health center to have this tenderness under my nipple checked out... and I've never gone to the student health center. Not even freshman year when my toe nail was turning black and crusty and starting to fall off, and the SHC was just across the street. I don't want to be one of those people you always see (but mostly hear) while in the hospital waiting room who complain to the secretary that the last four times they came in this week, their prescription seemed far too weak, because it's been two whole days and they've still got a cold. It drives me nuts.

To make a long story (which involves an early morning trip, Julie Bowen on Dawson's Creek, getting felt up, and talking about Crossgen Comics with a trained man of medicine) short, it turns out that breast cancer is actually pretty freakin' rare in men, and it's far more likely than not that my nipple was stimulated from running.

"Crouching Panther, Hidden Dialogue"
To answer (or rather, "respond to") your questions: "Who the hell told you that?" "Maybe to get away," "No. Not really. I think there was a diction dilemma that was somewhat misleading," "I don't think so," "You'd have to ask a doctor... or at least Irfan," "I don't understand your question," and "I'm not really sure... but I really kind of want to answer 'That you're nuts.'"

"Banger at the Gate of the Fortress of Solitude II: Electric Boogaloo"
I had a very pleasant Easter at home... though I missed the guy who had a heartattack at Mass, causing the priest to interrupt the proceedings so he could administer the last rites. My mother and sister (who actually witnessed the event) and pretty sure the guy was okay.

I'm not sure if you can really appreciate the dynamic of your family until you see it through someone elses eyes. Thanks for that opportunity, Jeffries. It was nice to have you over.

And please. Forgive the cat. He's young.

"My Crazed Roommate Makes the Grade"
I've always kind of wondered if I'd like My Crazed Roommate if it weren't for the fact that he reads comic books. And after almost a year of living with him I think I can finally answer that question.

I'm friends with Caleb Prewitt because he's a principled man with a good heart who understands that sometimes we have to wear masks.

The fact that he always knows whether I'm referencing Joe Kelly or Christopher Priest in casual conversation is just sort of the salsa on the lime-flavored chips.

"The Story Thus Far..."
The last chapter of a five-or-six-issue storyline in Black Panther is usually a delight to read.

I mean, up to that point, Priest has thrown so many odd plot twists and crazy ideas at you, you're fairly certain there's no way that our intrepid title character can actually understand what's going on or have any command of the situation. And in the last chapter, T'Challa starts opening those trap doors and everything falls into place... exactly the way he planned it.

I could use a "last chapter of Return of the Dragon" moment these days. This year's running themes of responsibility, Bubble Boy, the big M.O. issue, finishing Scenes from the Next, honesty, cookies, and reality vs. fantasy are all coming to a head... and dammit, I'd really like to believe that I've been prepared for all of this all along.

So like the good Priest says...

We will have a conclusion to these matters...
Soon.

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