When all is said and done, this is going to be my fault.
- Paul Jenkins, "Countdown"

"Countdown"
*1 week until Big Fish finally comes to the uncultured Midwest
*1 month to finish Scenes from the Next in time for Kate's 22nd birthday (only making it two years late)
*417 hours until my final semester at the University of Missouri begins
*6 months until Spider-Man 2: Electric Boogaloo"
*8 to 10 days until I return to CoMo.
*17 pounds from the amazing/spectacular/ultimate ideal
*One or two issues of Lenar Clark until "Once and For All" kicks off!
*135 days to graduation
*37 blog entries until I quit and delete this whole sorry mess.

"Year of the Monkey"
Another New Year's come and gone, and I think Semi-Sonic put it best (take that Counting Crows!): You tell yourself what you want to hear because you have to believe This'll be my year.

(That's not to detract from Adam Duritz and company's oeuvre in the least. "Mr. Jones" named my apartment. "Mrs. Potter's Lullabye" tucks me in at night. And with any luck, this will be the year for "Monkey".)

Here's hoping I don't screw up 2004 like I screwed up 2003. I've got high hopes, however. Any year with a Spider-Man movie in the middle's gotta go down like an oreo cookie. I should go get some milk...

"Resolve That..."
You know whom I always hated? That kid who, when asked what they're giving up for Lent, says "I'm giving up giving things up." That's not clever. It's painful.

Plus that kid was the same guy who said one of his New Year's Resolutions was to stop making resolutions. God! They make me so friggin' angry!

Anyhoozle, I'm, uh, resolved to be less distant and socially awkward this year. It's taken me three years, but I'm finally starting to think that perhaps Kelly was being facetious when he wrote "Interest means desperation. Aloof equals cool." I'm also going to try to be ruled less by fear from now on. (Don't know how successful I'm gonna be with that, considering right now, I'm scared to read my e-mail.) Kate Jeffries told me that with a little confidence, there's almost nothing I couldn't do, and she's the first person I've ever heard that from who made me believe it. I just hope this doesn't turn me into a bigger asshole. And I'm gonna dial down the Spider-Man obsession. Really. At the same time, however, I'm not going to make the same mistake this year that I made in 2002, when I resolved to see Spider-Man in theaters as many times as Kate Jeffries saw Titanic. I successfully matched Jeffries in number of times seeing the movie, but she pointed out that Titanic is a longer movie, and as such, she spent more total time in-theater. With Spider-Man 2, I'm going to calculate for time and make up the difference. That'll put that curly-haired Texan in her place for sure!

Maybe I oughta just resolve to get a life. Or to drink more heavily.

NEXT:
"Twenty-One and a Half"

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