This too shall pass. It's like a soap opera for weird people.
- Paul Jenkins, Spectacular Spider-Man #6

"For Those of You Keeping Score at Home..."
Did not: work on inquiry letter or resume.

Did: get lead on summer job and hit library to kick of cultural revolution.

Did: read Avengers Forever, but as My Crazed Roommate can attest, that did more harm than good, as reading a 12-issue temporal paradox will do that to a body. Get help. Need therapy.

Did not: remember to tape final Angel. (No big loss there.)

So let's just shrug our shoulders, call it even and move on.

"Post Up on D"
It's taken me about a month and a half, but I've finally got a link to Clinging to Sanity, the blog of one of my FIG Kids who was affectionately nicknamed Ja-bobs for about a month before we all totally forgot about it.

For those of you wondering when the hell I was a Peer Advisor for the University of Missouri's Res Life program, let me explain that part of the psychotic break that marred my fifth semester involved me loosely banding four incoming FARCers together and claiming them as my own Freshman Interest Group, complete with damn-near daily Pro-Seminars at 11pm in the middle of the first floor hallway. I'd rant at them about how to shirk on responsibility and procrastinate with style into the wee hours of the morning, or until Dalsing came out to yell at us, whichever came first.

I'm sorry it's taken me so long to link you, Adam. I thought about trying to claim that I was busy with school and graduating, but you of all people should know that I did most of that with my eyes closed... and probably drunk to boot. Maybe if you'd ever turned in that final FIG assignment, I would have made it a priority. Probably not though.

And as for everyone else: Go. Read. And see how I've clearly had nothing to teach any of my FIG kids, because they're all so obviously beyond me.

"Timeout. Switch It Up"
I'm thinking of overhauling the post-it notes in the weeks to come. Giving us some fresh little black duck nuggets of wisdom. (I was going for a whole duck/chicken nugget thing there, but it still seems like I'm talking about tiny turds, doesn't it?) So if anyone else wants a link, don't hesitate to ask.

"The Numbers Game"
I have a confession to make:

It has bothered me to no end that Erin Tuttle has over 200 posts while I languish at the paltry sum of 143. I mean, honestly, how many times have we seen this chick go weeks without posting, while I -- rocksteady workhorse that I am -- keep a constant flow of my blatherings plopping onto the net like brown bombs into a toilet bowl? (Sheesh, I think I really have to poop or something.)

It bothered me until I took a look and realized I've written well-over twice as many words as her. And big words, too. I've got a thesaurus and I know how to use it. My blog clearly dwarfs hers. I mean, sure, her blog's one of those solid thick turds you're worried isn't going to go down when you flush, but mine's like a diarrhetic meltdown, right?

All this clearly indictates that I have way too much time on my hands and I can't stop talking shit. (Seriously... what's with the fecal matter metaphors? Have I cracked?)

*Sigh*
Whatever happened to the guy who had something important to say?