it’s another i could trust you,
it’s another thing to swear,
i’m ok with all the others,
it’s just her i cannot stand,
i’m old enough to feel the way i do...
- Pete Yorn, "June"

"Tongue-Tied"
I really don't know what to say, which kind of begs the question, "Then why are you blogging right now?"

The sad, short answer: Writing in this blog is the most exciting part of my day.

(I mean, other than my marathon Spider Solitaire sessions -- and I swear to God, Prewitt, if you delete anything off of that laptap, I'm tossing you out on your ass. I'm not kidding.)

I will say, however, that I am always surprised by the sheer volume of things I can learn without really trying. Surprised and disappointed. I feel like I spend half the time running around with my eyes closed and my hands over my ears mumbling "I don't want to know, I don't want to know..." But I'm cursed with this innate sense of things. Besides, we all know how it is: You don't want to know; you have to know. Whatever.

I was taking one of my constitutionals -- which is just another word for mopey wandering -- and I went past Jesse Hall and looked up to see all those bats that swarm around the dome that I completely forgot about and I took off running. I can't tell you why. I guess I'm of a superstitious and cowardly lot. Go figure.

Jeffries and I were talking and she said something that kind of surprised me. She told me that I'm not afraid to be myself. For years I thought I didn't really have a personality, or that I didn't even know who I really was, or somesuch nonsense, but now even I -- more determined to tear myself down than you can possibly imagine -- can no longer deny the fact that no matter what else I may be, I'm definitely me. Don't get me wrong. It's not that I make no apologies for being so truly and utterly Clark, but most of the time, I apologize for no other reason than the simple fact that I really like saying I'm sorry.

and you have stayed a mile away from me
and you will stay a mile away from me
if you know what’s good for you...